Humpday Haiku #23

You’re telling me once all this is over…

I just put on a
bra, walk into a bar, and
eat communal nuts?

Humpday Haiku #22

It’s not like Earth pushes herself every year

“Here’s to another
orbit with no change in my
speed or appearance.”

“The darkest days are ahead of us”

Yes, but my eyes have
adapted and now I live
like this every day.

Underrated characters in holiday movies

Royals fall in love,
thanks to hardworking Christmas
trees in every scene.

Love Languages: Thanksgiving Edition

Don’t eat together,
don’t journey, don’t bake for hours,
and don’t you dare hug.

Pg. 2020, “This Might as Well Happen” (Nonfiction)

Along with truth, science,
and weight goals, my favorite
tee has disappeared.

A salve for bad days

Things could still be worse.
You could have an entire
nation despise you.